#except he’s not | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

morphinomenaljew · 2 years ago

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Hi Misha Collins?

What does it feel like to be the living manifestation of an onion article written by emotionally stunted destiels???

Is there a reminder on your phone to say the most unhinged out of pocket stuff on fan important anniversaries?

And most importantly,

How the fuck did you convince them not to make you sign a G-ddamn NDA??????‽

#misha collins #first man to be queerbaited in real life #on all levels except physical #that’s a bisexual #except he’s not #Misha needs us all to know he’s painfully regrettably perplexingly heterosexual #a very This Is Why We Can’t Have Nice Things (Taylor’s Version) to Warner Bros #goodbye you all i’ll remember you in therapy

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butchfalin · 1 year ago

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the funniest meltdown ive ever had was in college when i got so overstimulated that i could Not speak, including over text. one of my friends was trying to talk me through it but i was solely using emojis because they were easier than trying to come up with words so he started using primarily emojis as well just to make things feel balanced. this was not the Most effective strategy... until. he tried to ask me "you okay?" but the way he chose to do that was by sending "👉🏼👌🏼❓" and i was so shocked by suddenly being asked if i was dtf that i was like WHAT???? WHAT DID YOU JUST SAY TO ME?????????? and thus was verbal again

#yeehaw #1k #5k #10k #posts that got cursed. blasted. im making these tag updates after... 19 hours?#also i have been told it should say speech loss bc nonverbal specifically refers to the permanent state. did not know that!#unfortunately i fear it is so far past containment that even if i edited it now it would do very little. but noted for future reference #edit 2: nvm enough ppl have come to rb it from me directly that i changed the wording a bit. hopefully this makes sense #also. in case anyone is curious. though i doubt anyone who is commenting these things will check the original tags #1) my friend did not do this on purpose in any way. it was not intended to distract me or to hit on me. im a lesbian hes a gay man. cmon now #he felt very bad about it afterwards. i thought it was hilarious but it was very embarrassed and apologetic #2) “why didn't he use 🫵🏼?” didn't exist yet. “why didn't he use 🆗?” dunno! we'd been using a lot of hand emojis. 👌🏼 is an ok sign #like it makes sense. it was just a silly mixup. also No i did not invent 👉🏼👌🏼 as a gesture meaning sex. do you live under a rock #3) nonspeaking episodes are a recurring thing in my life and have been since i was born. this is not a quirky one-time thing #it is a pervasive issue that is very frustrating to both myself and the people i am trying to communicate with. in which trying to speak is #extremely distressing and causes very genuine anguish. this post is not me making light of it it's just a funny thing that happened once #it's no different than if i post about a funny thing that happened in conjunction w a physical disability. it's just me talking abt my life #i don't mind character tags tho. those can be entertaining. i don't know what any of you are talking about #Except the ppl who have said this is pego/ryu or wang/xian. those people i understand and respect #if you use it as a writing prompt that's fine but send it to me. i want to see it #aaaand i think that's it. everyday im tempted to turn off rbs on it. it hasn't even been a week

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anyknotrants · 15 days ago

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-after Damian turned 16, at the family dinner-

Bruce: so... Damian, do you remember the Oreov girl you met at the gala last week?

Damian: *looks up* yes

Bruce: what do you think of her...?

Dick: *tries not to laugh*

Tim: *fails not to laugh*

Steph: *doesn't even try not to laugh*

Damian: she was... acceptable, if a bit annoying, why do you ask?

Tim: He's trying to set you up!

Batkids -Damian: *laughs*

Damian: *stares blankly*

Bruce: of course, you don't hav-

Damian: father, are you unaware that I'm in a committed relationship?

Duke, Tim and Dick: *choke on their food*

Steph: *chokes on her drink*

Cass: *smiles*

Batkids: WHAT?!

Bruce: ... I-....

Jason: *laughs so hard he almost falls from his chair* oh Jesus Christ! The world's best detectives at their finest!

Dick: you knew? And you didn't tell me?!

Jason: where the fuck do you think he went almost every fucking friday?

Bruce: *turns to Damian* I- I though you were having sleepover with Jon

Damian: I was.

Dick: but you just-

Batfam: *stops all their movememnt as they realize*

Jason: *actually falls from his chair laughing*

Bruce: JONATHAN SAMUEL KENT!

-over at the Kent farm, also having family dinner-

Jon, who heard Bruce shout his name: I feel like I'm going to get murdered by a bat in my sleep

Clark, who was also listening in: right after you explain why I had to find out you're dating Damian throught their family dinner

Jon: hehe... fuck

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astronomical-bagel · 10 months ago

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#ok no but for real this is genuinely my friend group.#the only one that's a little iffy is the anime catgirl bc 98% of us are dudes. with the exception of me and one other #we even have a union guy 😭#side note chilchuck's name would 100% be Chris if he was a real guy. he's such a Chris. (I mean it COULD be chuck but. Chris is better)#dungeon meshi #delicious in dungeon #senshi of izganda #izutsumi #marcille donato #laios touden #chilchuck tims #chilchuck #falin touden #astronomically random

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justletmescrolll · 7 months ago

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$90 CAD gale dress up game

#baldur's gate 3 #bg3 #gale of waterdeep #gale dekarios #afflicted with screenshot redraw curse except theyre all idle animations #me when hes just fuckin standing there: 😍📸✍️. apparently.#god bless you modders hes never been sluttier

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blossoms-phan · 4 months ago

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there’s not a mfer in this world I’ve ever respected more than 2009 dan. that was a mastermind. a man on a mission. he had one shot and he knew he had to take it. now he walks into the kitchen of the forever home he shares with the subject of “did you ever doubt your dream would come true” and gets greeted with “hello you stupid bitch”

#what can i say except #he won #dnp #dan and phil #phan #daniel howell #phil lester

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starii-void · 7 months ago

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going to chb must be crazy like imagine sharing a camp with

-one of the strongest demigods ever who's saved the world like at least 3 times, fought multiple gods & titans and WON (and is a tartarus survivor)

-the literal main architect of OLYMPUS who's also saved the world multiple times (also tartarus survivor)

-THE lord of the wild who's also close friends with the first two (and has helped save the world multiple times)

-an emo kid from the 1930s who again helped save the world and is also a tartarus survivor (TWICE)

-a son of apollo who survived tartarus with nothing but cargo shorts and sheer will (pun intended)

-the main designer and builder for the argo II, also the first hephaestus kid to have fire powers since hundreds of years ago (did i mention killed gaea? no? yeah he did that too)

-a girl who somehow charmspeak-ed gaea into falling back asleep (also side note daughter of super famous actor because why not)

-pretty much everybody is a two-time war veteran

-THE GOD APOLLO who just sometimes comes down to visit in the form of a teenage boy

-did i mention dionysus, god of wine madness and theatre

-also chiron, trainer of pretty much every greek hero ever

#shit's crazy #theyre basically living history #percy is kinda the new hercules except less macho manly man #'oh who's killed this guy before' 'percy jackson'#like can you imagine playing capture the flag with rhese bastards #ur scaling the wall and you see these mfs make it up there in like 2 jumps #they arent allowed to be in the same team for any of the games because you KNOW theyd beat everyone else's asses #people are fighting to have percy on their team #not to mention the gods that just pop in for a visit every now and then #like at this point the fact that DIONYSUS is their camp counselor isnr even that surprising anymore #some scrawny teen dude shows up and will's just 'oh hey dad'#'YOU MEAN APOLLO????' 'yeah lol he just visits sometimes'#pretty much everyone there has survived at least one war #the background characters must feel hella overshadowed bcs what does it matter if u won a game when the guy in the cabin across has like #saved the world. 3 different times. like wtf #pjo books #leo valdez #trials of apollo #lester papadopoulos #pjo fandom #percy jackson #grover underwood #nico di angelo #annabeth chase #pjo hoo toa #heroes of olympus #piper mclean #chiron #camp half blood #pjo text post

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wolfythewitch · 3 months ago

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Very unserious human bill design haha

#I don't think I'll ever properly make one haha. This one is very obviously catered to my tastes agahsgshs. Bill except he's like a #weird frienemy of the family #art #sketch #digital art #gravity falls #bill cipher

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greystend · 5 months ago

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Batman, panicked by how much the villain knows about him and Jason, decides to infiltrate the Red Hood's gang with his Matches Malone's identity

Jason *oh shit he found out* : wtf wtf wtf is this a joke ? Are you making fun of me ???

Matches!Bruce *oh fuck he's even more unhinged than planned* : ... I don't understand, boss ?

Jason, struggling to find his words in way his men won't understand : you really thought I wouldn't recognize my own fa- urgh I mean genito- wait that not- hum, the guy that raised me ???

Matches!Bruce *wait oh shit the OG Matches Malone had a kid ???* : wait... *I don't even know his name!!* chum, I had to make sure it's really you, I wasn't sure, you understand ?

And then their relationship get better

except Jason is "argh I hate you but also you kinda made the effort of meeting me in my turf and also you didn't say anything about the killing so perhaps..."

and Bruce is like,"Oh shit I accidentally adopted the Red Hood, and also it's my fault his real father is dead, except he doesn't know that and must think Matches just abandoned him one day without any explanation. Also I should really figure out his name at some point"

#bruce wayne #batman #jasontodd #jason todd #red hood #matches malone #undercover #accidental adoption #except he's already your son

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jobycewl · 2 months ago

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I believe in the “Everyone is jealous of Shang Qinghua” agenda

#my art #procreate #svsss #scum villian self saving system #shen qingqiu #shang qinghua #cumplane #liu qingge #yue qingyuan #qi qingqi #mu qingfang #comic #shang qinghua hoping the others would take pity on him for being bullied more by qingqiu #except why does it feel like everyone all of sudden wants to give him more work?!?#at this rate he’s gonna go into a year long seclusion and come back with coffee #which ofc shen qingqiu is gonna then get even WORSE about ‘bullying’ Qinghua for this drink #its a vicious cycle #blackening of shang qinghua

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humming-fly · 27 days ago

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He was feeling left out

and the higher rez stills, since gifs always export as if you're sending messages through a metal can~

#you may be wondering why I put so much effort into this #I'm curious too funny how these things happen sometimes #anyways I think omega has jets on his back that would let him fly but consider: he wants to Look Cool #shadow the hedgehog #rouge the bat #omega e123 #sxsg #sonic x shadow generations #team dark #sxsg spoilers #sonic #idk how long I need to tag spoilers but I'll be nice #comic #having the camera shifted towards shadow for the middle bit was a Mistake #he is soooo much harder to draw than rouge asl;dkfj #like one degree off on the eyes and it becomes unviable I swear #except for profiles ironically that first panel was easy as hell #looking back on this I love how I Completely changed how I drew rouge's wings after the first panel #I think the difference was I just swapped refs and her character model was different lol #meanwhile I'm just blatantly cheating shadow's wings for the middle panel purely to fit them in at all #I truly love how oversized they are except for when I'm trying to make a readable composition #yet another reason he should've been back to the camera rather than facing it in the middle but so it goes #my art #doodles

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ghost-bxrd · 3 months ago

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Prompt:

Brucie Wayne gets into a mild accident in public (read-got hit by a car). And Batman would just walk it off (“it’s barely a bruise”), but Brucie obviously… can’t.

So he has to suffer the ordeal of having civilians call paramedics, getting fussed over, and having-

Having his dead son get into the back of the ambulance with him.

Oh- oh no. He must have hit his head worse than he thought. He thought he was past this…

#((Jason is the one who hit him with the car))#(((but it truly was an accident)))#((((and now his elaborate revenge plans got derailed because OMG I HIT MY DAD WITH A CAR))))#Brucie gets to blubber and cry about his son in a way Batman isn’t allowed to #meanwhile Jason: omg pls shut up PLS I’m BEGGING you just die already #Bruce: anything for you 🥹#Jason: …. hold on no I didn’t mean that B do NOT fall asleep on me right now #some more fake hallucinations #but nobody thinks it’s a hallucination except Bruce #also: Wayne Son Back From The Dead!? more on page two!#((Jason takes his revenge by trying to boot Tim from the family and realizing he’s not even part of it which—))#((is anybody taking care of that raccoon? well Jason is now))))#prompts #crack au #fanfiction #inspiration #jason todd #batfamily #dick grayson #bruce wayne #batfam #robin #tim drake #red hood #Batdad #Brucie wayne

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eightspringdays · 1 month ago

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Never forget the fact that, because he was roleplaying as his nonexistent lil sister, his twitter account got banned for a while and had to scream publicity he was, in fact, Tatsuki Fujimoto roleplaying as his nonexistent lil sister.

And no one believed him at first.